Reel Terror: “BRAIIIIINS” and Bodysuits: Why Return of the Living Dead II is a Reward for Horror Fans

Why *wouldn’t* I enjoy this sequel? I wouldn’t trade the original for a thing. As it was with that first film, everyone involved seems to be having a great time creating gross monsters and cracking jokes. Although there is some legitimate terror and gore, these films are more about having fun with makeup effects and saying “BRAIIIIINS” in various ways.

For some reason, both James Karen and Thom Mathews are back for the sequel, yet not playing the same characters. I don’t quite get it- but their characters actually recognize they’ve been through something just like this before, despite being different…characters. I suppose it doesn’t matter- when a film gives you a decapitated, undead head voicing distress about a screwdriver lodged in its ear, it’s sufficiently entertaining to ignore such trivial things as logic or “canon”. In other words, I feel the appropriate bar was set for these movies, and they served me well in turn.

Sure, this is measurably less witty than the first, and it’s missing the wonderful Don Calfa serving as the audience proxy. ‘Return of the Living Dead: Part II’ also teaches us that the undead can be captivated by mid-morning aerobics shows. If that’s all it took, 80s zombies never really had a chance, what with the extensive catalogs of Richard Simmons, Jane Fonda, Kathy Smith, and Body by Jake.

Apparently, there are at least two more of these flicks in the series, but I won’t bother. Not only are they outside of this project’s focus, there’s just no way they can be as fun, nor do they have the legendary poster artwork these two had. These first two are like redeeming a cinematic reward voucher for enduring all the subpar horror/monster/zombie flicks I’ve watched in the last 20 years.