The Thing

Episode 3: The Thing (1982)

Theme: 80s John Carpenter Films
Hosts: Oz & Curtis

This week, Oz and Curtis bundle up, grab their flamethrowers, and head to Antarctica for The Thing — the 1982 horror masterpiece where the cold isn’t the real danger… it’s your coworker, your dog, or possibly your coworker’s dog.

Join your two favorite warm-blooded hosts as they discuss:

• Why Jed the dog gives a performance so good, Meryl Streep should’ve sent him a fruit basket.
• How 22-year-old special-effects wizard Rob Bottin woke up and chose “nightmare fuel” every single day of production.
• Why Wilford Brimley without a mustache is somehow more upsetting than any alien transformation.
• Whether the Thing is a parasitic lifeform, or just the world’s pushiest roommate trying to borrow everyone’s shape.
• How Carpenter manages to turn Antarctica into the worst corporate retreat in history:
  No trust. No communication. No warmth. No HR department.
• And of course, the blood test scene — the only time in cinema where a petri dish has better comedic timing than half of SNL’s cast.

From chest-mouth CPR disasters to face-hands to “is that guy breathing or is he secretly an alien?” Oz and Curtis break down Carpenter’s masterclass in paranoia, tension, and goo.

Final Verdict:

Oz – Ten Jeds out of ten
Curtis – Twelve pocket-warmed Werther’s Originals
Both – Still unsure if the other one is a Thing.