The Bodyguard

Episode 15: The Bodyguard (1992)

Theme: Wife’s Choice Romance Month
Hosts: Oz & Curtis

This week, Oz and Curtis dive into The Bodyguard — the 1992 romantic thriller where Kevin Costner glowers, Whitney Houston shines, and every camera operator works overtime to capture dramatic spinning kisses without throwing up.

Join your two over-caffeinated romantics as they unpack:

• Why Frank Farmer has the most superhero-sounding name ever, yet chooses to fight evil using only paranoia, frowning, and a well-timed fruit knife.

• How Whitney Houston manages to play “mega-famous pop star” with uncanny accuracy. Almost like she’s done this before…

• Why this movie spends two hours proving that love is real and security systems are not.

• How the official Bodyguard Rulebook apparently includes:

  1. Cutting oranges with a tactical knife,
  2. Jogging silently in denim,
  3. And refusing to turn on lights when cooking.

• Why the movie gives us two villains for the price of one: a creepy stalker AND an overachieving hitman who shows up like it’s Bring-Your-Gun-to-the-Oscars Day.

• And of course, the line heard ’round the world:
  “He’s my bodyguard!”
  (Which honestly feels like something Oz yells when Curtis tries to eat the last pizza slice.)

Expect singing, explosions, emotional whiplash, and a samurai sword that does absolutely no guarding whatsoever.

Final Verdict:

Oz — Six and a half katanas
Curtis — Six entire Waterworlds
Both — Still cooking dinner in the dark like true ’90s action heroes.