Beverly Hills Ninja

Episode 149: Beverly Hills Ninja (1997)

Theme: Not-a-Martial-Arts-Movie (But Also… Kind of?)
Hosts: Oz & Curtis

This week, Oz and Curtis launch a brand-new theme by chopping, rolling, and pratfalling their way into Beverly Hills Ninja — the only movie brave enough to say, “What if The Karate Kid, 3 Ninjas, Black Sheep, and Master of Disguise all got into a fender-bender on Sunset Blvd and kept driving anyway?” Chris Farley somersaults through sushi bars, strip clubs, and high-end hotels as Haru, the Great White Ninja who is neither great nor particularly ninja-like, but absolutely committed to the bit.

Join your two favorite Dojo Dropouts as they unpack:

How Haru manages to break more property in 10 minutes than most villains do in an entire trilogy.

Why Gobei deserves hazard pay for spending a lifetime being hit by every weapon Haru has ever touched.

Chris Rock’s character arc, which is mostly “man chases chickens” and somehow still works.

The hibachi fight sequence, where fish become nunchucks and Farley delivers the most dramatic spatula throw in cinema history.

The counterfeit-yen plot that feels like it was written on a napkin during lunch… and stayed on the napkin.

From astral projection disasters to accidental harpooning, from strip-club detours to mushroom-induced bonding, Oz and Curtis break down a movie that’s dumb, earnest, chaotic, and somehow exactly what you remember.

Final Verdict

Oz — 3 Ninjas
Curtis — Rule #34: How to pull a man's head off with your bare hands
Both — Still unclear why the bouncers waited that long to pull Farley off the strip-club stage.